Sunday, February 28, 2010

Why can't I seem to be happy?

You know I will start today with this, I am mystified, stupefied, dumbfounded that I can't seem to be happy.  Why is this? At one point in my life I seemed to be happy on the outside of course not inside.  I need an answer. I know somewhere out there, there is someone worse off then me...that's what I have heard.  I have not been abused in my adult my childhood yes I was very abused.  Verbally and physically. I just want to live in a place where everything has its place and has a purpose, and have some space.  To talk to people and not think that they are laughing at me or thinking I disgust them. I just want to cry, I'm an old lady not needed, with no purpose...give me a gun and let me shoot my brains out.  Yea that's what you want isn't  world.

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